If Staffing Agency Conversations Were 100% Honest (on both ends)

Again, I was motivated/slap-happy and thought about what a 100% honest conversation between a staffing agency rep/headhunter/people broker/crappy, unemployable worker monger/flesh peddler/pimp and a HR professional that gets stuck with them on the phone.

If BOTH sides were 100% honest, I think that the conversation would sound like this...

VHRG: WHAT?!?!?! I've got six things I'm working on right now, and you happen to call. Do you have a camera hidden in my office.
StaffingRep: Hi this is Pimp from FleshPeddlers employing the unemployable since 1989.
VHRG: (groan) How long to I have to talk to you before you hang up the phone and give up?
StaffingRep: Shortly after I tell you about the unemployable rejects that I have. Want to just suck it up and deal with it?
VHRG: Sure.
StaffingRep: I have two guys out on work release, one guy that I'm stunned passed his piss test - but he did, a former trapeeze artist who recently developed vertigo, a guy that has been chased out of his last three employers two to eight weeks after he got hired full-time as if he forgot how to do the work - once by a supervisor with a bat, and a hot girl.
VHRG: How hot is the hot girl?
StaffingRep: A solid "10".
VHRG: Intrguing! She got any skills?
StaffingRep: Only if you call texting, flirting, surfing the net for modelling gigs, IM'ing, chewing gum, and filing nails, 'skills'. If you ask her to do something work-related she'll make a sexual harassment complaint. If you ask her to lunch, and you're buying, she'll gladly go.
VHRG: Hmmmmmm....... I guess we'll pass on her.
StaffingRep: That's good. At her last three jobs jobs, she broke up a marriage, an engagment, and turned the rececptionist into a lesbian.
VHRG: Yeah... passing.