My (semi) irrational hatred of Subway

Subway... eat fresh!

Taste nothing!

I can't stand Subway. It's a lunch option that I pass every single day. Any time I think it's a good idea to eat there and I go, I immediately regret it.

Subway is horrible.

First, the gap between the pictures of the food and the food you actually get is insane. The commercials make the food look delicious. What you actually get looks like it could give you diphtheria.

Second, zero taste. Only at Subway could you get a meatball sub and be stuck in a debate with yourself heading back to work as to whether or not you actually consumed food during your lunch. I believe this is because of the "meat" that is available at subway. If you got these "meats" from your favorite deli, it wouldn't be your favorite deli anymore. It has no flavor. Don't believe me? Get a 6-inch sub with your favorite roast beef/turkey/ham, with whatever you get on it, and then get a veggie sub with the same ingredients and tell me if you notice the difference.

Third, yes, it healthy, but the healthy subs are the same ones that taste the worst. But this isn't going to be a riff about health. Heaven knows that more fast food places should strive to offer better choices. This is about the options that you have to make the food taste better. To keep the sandwich healthy, you can put mustard, spices, or... mustard on the sandwich. The other option is toast the sub the the oven. For 20 seconds of overheating, your sandwich will come out semi-hot and smelling like someone lit a dumpster on fire.

Finally, the staff that typically is employed at these places tend to look like they are waiting for a call from the governor to stop the execution. I understand that when we were kids exactly zero of us said, "I want to make below mediocre sandwiches at a chain restaurant." But could you at least lie to me and fake like you actually want to be there. The rest of the working has to do it. Subway should be an exception.

By the way, with the chips, the drink, and the antidote, that'll be $8.59.